I imagine most almost-three-year-olds talk a lot but I don't have a real reference point. All I know, is that we have another talking human being in our family full of questions, ideas and opinions. And some of the stuff she says blows my mind.
So far, miss chatter box really only graces us with her talkative, inquisitive ways. Buttercup has always been a reserved child. Slow to warm up to people, or in a lot of cases, never warms up to people.
I think she's barely spoken a word to anyone that isn't us (her parents) or her grandparents or aunts. When asked a direct question she usually kinda just stares back at the person. It can be awkward. I've read I'm not supposed to answer for her but I admit, sometimes the silence kills me!
But she's starting to talk! To strangers! People she's never met before. In my mind, this is a huge.
I've been dragging Buttercup to a lot of doctor appointments lately. And she does remarkably well. She's such a little grown up sometimes, asking questions, making observations. At a recent eye appointment, the technician asked her if she was having a baby brother or baby sister. Usual pause followed with BC just staring back and then she said, "A BABY BROTHER!" I almost fell over myself.
We've had a few other moments. A lady asked her her name. Pause...long pause and then BC answered with great authority, "I AM SOPHIA."
I know this might be "no big deal" but BC has always been so reserved. It's always been a concern of mine.
Am I enabling her shyness? Squashing her ability to be a self sufficient, independent adult? Am I coddling her? Doing more harm keeping her at home with me instead of sending her to school? These are questions I've over-analyzed about myself and things I've been criticized for.
Lately, I've seen BC make huge social strides. We've been taking music classes since Buttercup was about 18 months. In the beginning, BC sat on my lap and barely participated. I admit, I fretted and compared. Children younger than her would actively participate, go and grab instruments. Not my kid. This past week in music class, when I saw her singing at the top of her lungs and laughing out loud during some of the activities my.heart.soared.
Not only does it bring me joy but there's a certain validation I feel. Do you remember the "How do you like them apples?" scene from 'Good Will Hunting?' That's how I feel.
I've been a mother for almost three years now. It's been an amazing journey but it's also been at times a lonely journey sometimes full of self doubt and anxiety. You see, it turns out, EVERYBODY'S A CRITIC. And when it comes to parenting, holy shit. People are frigging analyzing the crap out of you. And I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of my relatives and friends WHO DON'T HAVE KIDS being so quick to offer parenting solutions or criticisms.
I'm sick of friends WITH KIDS that think it's ok to make unsupportive comments or tell you how you should handle your kid.
But mostly I'm sick of MYSELF for doubting myself and not squashing the critics right from the bat and letting them get into my head.
As I wait for baby boy to arrive and for Buttercup to lose her status as an only child, I'm feeling nervous. I'm pretty sure this new chapter of parenthood will rock all our worlds and I fully expect a new wave of challenges and obstacles. But I'm hoping that if I've learned anything so far being a mom is that, my kid is all right. We are going to be just fine.
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