shoeless in new york

So there I was on 66th and Columbus feeling pretty good about myself. I had just purchased the MAC mineral foundation and the pretty make-up lady had just put some on my face and  I'm feeling all around pleased with myself. I was even proud of my bump. (I've been watching hair tutorials lately. god bless you tube.) I have always envied girls with bumps... 


 and while my bump pales in comparison and I think you can see all the bobby pins in disarray at least it's a BUMP. So I head out to catch the cross town bus to meet my friend Ginny who lucky for me offered to let me borrow her silver clutch for tomorrow night. And I see the bus on the corner and so I start to run to catch the bus. And then BAM the strap to my stupid flip flop breaks and I'm trying to catch myself and not fall flat on my face in the middle of the intersection. 

Yup there I am-I can't walk with the flip flop the whole strap is broken so what do I do?? I take the flip flop off and walk with only one shoe...yes, thus EXPOSING MY FOOT TO THE DIRTY STREETS OF NEW YORK!

There's something you should know about me-I am a germ phob so it's unfortunate that I live in such a dirty city. And New York City is dirty believe me you (or is it believe you me?)  I've lived her for five years and after my first summer here I vowed to stop wearing flops. I LOVE flip flops don't get me wrong is there anything that more summery than throwing on flip flops and running out the door.

Well guess what, you wear flip flops in this city you will come home and your feet will be BLACK-like dirt. BLACK. That's how dirty this place is. And so I NEVER wear flip flops..well never except today when I don't know what flew up my skirt and made me think oh it'll be okay if I wear flip flops it'll look good with this summer dress. HA BAD DECISION my friend, bad decision.

I had to wobble to a cab, yes a cab. My bare foot was also exposed to the cab despite my best efforts not to let my foot touch the floor.  I know what happens in cabs. People THROW UP in cabs because they can't handle their liquor. (Not that I, myself have ever thrown up in a cab. I moved her in my late twenties by then I had properly learned to handle my liquor)

To make matters worse, I finally get back to my apartment building and wouldn't you know it the guy waiting for the elevator checking out my pathetic attempt to wobble on one foot lives on the same floor. Great... "nice to meet you Steve. Yea, my strap broke. I live in 4G"

I went straight to the bathroom to scrub my feet. I am convinced I've caught some kind of disease.