How many ways can I screw up this interview?

I had an interview today.

I get really, really nervous when I have to go in for an interview.

Like, I'm talking straight up.not normal.serious.anxiety.

I've been walking around the apartment for the past day rehearsing my 30 second summary statement because I would rather die than go into a situation without you know..like a PLAN or at least an outline of what the heck I'm going to say.

Clearly, I didn't spend enough time worrying or perhaps I would've foreseen these unfortunate events.

First screw up.

Pantyhose.

Listen people, I'm no fashionista. But I do know that sheer, almost black pantyhose looks best with a black pencil skirt and heels.

I did think ahead to make sure I had a good pair of sheer, almost-black pantyhose in the drawer. I did not think ahead to make sure I had a BACK-UP pair of sheer, almost-black pantyhose.

Wouldn't you know it, I go to the bathroom right before I leave and yup, tear my pantyhose.

Panic.

Surely, I have another pair in the drawer, don't I?

Nope. Of course not.

I do find however, a pair of black tights.

Black tights..let me tell you people, they just don't look right with pencil skirt and heels! Listen, I don't make the rules people I just know it looks weird.

"Nonsense," my husband proclaims, "I don't even see a difference."

"You don't understand ANYTHING!" I cry.

But at this point..it is what it is. And there I am squeezing into my black tights only to discover they have white, fuzzy pills all over them.

Ohhh yea.. I remember these tights. These are tights I would just use to layer under clothes thus collecting white, fuzzy pills.

They are totally noticeable. Even hubby couldn't deny it. Five minutes before my scheduled time to walk out the door there is my husband on his knees, wrapping masking tape around his hand all in an effort to get rid of these white fuzz balls ALL OVER MY LEGS. (because of course our household doesn't own a lint remover roller thingie)

I, so do appreciate my husband coming home for lunch today to see me off to my interview.

But the show must go on. I make it to the interview with plenty of time and assure myself that I will maintain eye contact at all times so as to not allow the woman interviewing me to even have the CHANCE to notice the sad state of my appearance.

Second screw up.

I'm waiting for the woman that helped set up the interview in the lobby. I see her. I confidently walk up to her, smile and go to give firm and confident hand-shake and hear myself saying, "nice to MEET you."

Errr...REALLY??? I've met this woman before. In fact, this is our second meeting. Note to self, you say nice to MEET you when it's the FIRST TIME MEETING THAT PERSON!!!

augh I'm pretty sure she caught my error. Sure, it's not the end of the world but still....

I survived the interview, as for getting hired....we'll see...but it's been a long day.